Posts Tagged ‘adoption’

When My Father and My Mother Forsake Me, Then the Lord Will Take Me Up (Psalm 27v10)

January 16, 2019

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Just recently I have been reading about the experience of a lady who had been adopted and in later life had a yearning to find her biological parents. I believe that most people have this natural curiosity to discover who their birth parents are; she also had some health issues and wanted to know whether these were hereditary. This led to an initial contact with grandparents, who were delighted to hear from her – and later also with two brothers who were also initially glad to know about her. She discovered from her grandparents that her own parents later had married – which seemed wonderful and the best possible scenario. She now felt that she could contact her real mother and father who would be as welcoming as the rest of the family and be overjoyed to meet their only daughter.

Sadly this was not to be… they rejected her and wanted no contact whatsoever. Even her grandparents could not understand their attitude but both they and her brothers appeared to be strongly influenced by the reaction of the parents and in time made it clear that they had no wish for any further contact. The mother who had adopted her, loved her and raised her had also recently died, which distressed her terribly. Apart from her loving adoptive mother’s death, she said that this “second rejection,” as she saw it, was devastating for her.

Such stories are not unusual. This one is not set in my country but I have recently heard of many other similar stories here in Ireland where mothers have no wish to ever see or be in contact with the child that they gave birth to. On the other hand, there are many more stories of joyful reunions; these were often situations where mothers did not want to give up their children but were forced to do so by the prevailing power of the Roman Catholic system at the time. Such mothers were heartbroken when their babies were snatched away to be trafficked for adoption, with R.C. organisations being paid for the adoption. Indeed, many mothers searched for years for their children, some sadly dying, without ever having met them.

Nevertheless there are other stories which have come to my attention recently and these, although truly heart breaking from an initial glance, are surrounded by great hope, faith, blessing and victory. These are the stories of people, who having come to know the Lord Jesus Christ as Saviour, are totally abandoned by family, friends and loved ones. But these souls look to the Lord for their every breath – He is more than life itself to them. They continue to love and pray for those who have rejected them even though in some instances their lives are in danger, if for example, they have left a system of belief such as Islam.

Jesus said: “And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit eternal life.” (Matthew 19v29) Of course, this must be read in context. The Lord never expected anyone to abandon their children, or indeed a husband or wife if they are already married but often those who are called into certain service for Him, are led to remain unmarried and without children and so they forsake that way of life for Him. And as regards material property, we of course hand this to the Lord, for Him to use as He sees fit.  There is also a sense in which, when we are wholly following the Lord, our lives being guided in the way that He would have us go, that we will be forsaken of everything that the world holds dear and unfortunately we may also be forsaken by once good friends, loved ones or even spouses and older children.

“Can a mother forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.” (Isaiah 49v15)

What is your situation today? Do you feel that you have been denied by the very people who are responsible for your existence in this world? Well, there is Someone who loved you enough to die for you, even before you were ever born. Why not confess your sins (for we all have sinned) to the Lord Jesus Christ alone and put your trust in Him as Lord and Saviour? Believe me, you will find the greatest Friend for now and for eternity. He knows you, He loves you and your happiness and well-being in this life and the next… is His goal. “Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.” (Isaiah 49v16)

Do you feel abandoned today, or ridiculed because you have chosen to follow the Lord Jesus Christ as Saviour? Or could it be that you even feel in danger because you no longer want to be a part of something which you know is wrong? There is nothing in your life that the Lord Jesus Christ is not aware of – whoever you are or wherever you are. Remember that your times are in His hands and He will take care of every detail of your life, if you have committed it into His care.

Perhaps, on the other hand, you have had a loving family upbringing but still you may not know the Lord Jesus Christ as Saviour. Life, even for those of us who have a good start in it, can be stormy to say the least. Why would you want to face those storms alone, without the power of the One who loved you and gave Himself for you? With this Captain at the helm – you can be certain of victory!

Always remember that He will reward you “an hundredfold” and you shall “inherit everlasting life” (Matthew 19v29) in the Presence of Someone who loved you so much that He gave His life for you, when you trust in Him as Lord and Saviour.

Whether you have forsaken material possessions for His sake, or whether those you love have forsaken you, there is indeed “a Friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18v24)

May the Lord bless you and meet you at the point of your need.

 

As Time Goes By We Look At Our Roots…

January 15, 2018

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We inherit so much from our forefathers; everything from physical characteristics and mannerisms – to the genes which have an influence on our physical and even mental health. I believe that as we grow older, most of us are fascinated by the lives of our forefathers and when parents pass away, it is comforting to see some resemblance of them in our children.

Above is a photograph of my paternal grandmother who was born in New York in 1892 but returned with her parents to their native Ireland some years later. When I look in the mirror I sometimes see my father and at other times, my mother looking back at me and I smile in the knowledge that they have gone to a far better place where inherited diseases of the human race are no more. It is interesting to know why I look a certain way but it’s also good to know that I may be susceptible to certain problems with age – such as the glaucoma which my father inherited. Hereditary problems are something which can be prepared for, managed or even prevented when we have knowledge of them.

I have often wondered how it would feel to have been adopted, without any knowledge of who my parents were. If we have no idea who our parents are (or who even one of our parents is) it can leave a great void in life but it can also be a problem from a health point of view. I feel that if I had been adopted, I would really want to know my parents and yet I also know (from the experiences of friends) that such a meeting could possibly be a fiasco, at best. We have all known of emotional reunions between mothers or fathers and their children which have been a great success. We see two people running in slow motion towards each other. They talk non-stop and catch up on all the lost years between them, finding so much in common – and then they become friends for life. Often, however, in reality this is not the case.

I recently read of a lady who had been brought up by her mother, a single parent. She was anxious to meet her father but her mother seemed reluctant for this to happen – possibly because she wanted to protect her daughter from the inevitable hurt she knew would ensue. Eventually this young lady met her father, who to her shock was a priest in the Roman Catholic Church – and to her hurt was very secretive about their meeting. The last thing he wanted on earth was for there to be knowledge of this daughter and so, although he met her, he really wanted nothing to do with her. There is, in fact, now an organisation/support group for the many children of R.C. priests who are in this hurtful situation in which they may have been supported financially – but not emotionally.

In the era in which we live, the traditional family unit is under attack and there are really complex situations going on where people have no idea who one or even both of their parents are. Researching a family tree, as time goes on, may well become an impossible feat for many people. I have heard, too, of other terrible situations where someone discovers to their horror that they are dating “a half brother or sister” that they had no knowledge of.

As I read and take notes through the Book of Genesis once more, I also see that it was always God’s will for the family to be defined as one husband, one wife – and their family. Despite modern day philosophy and also some cults claiming otherwise, it was never in God’s will for a husband to take concubines and more than one wife or for a family unit to consist of two “husbands” or two “wives.”

Because something is recorded as an historical event or common practice in the Old Testament did not make it right in God’s eyes. “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” (Genesis 2v24) Jesus also echoes these words in Matthew 19v5.  I recall feeling sorry for Hagar, as she was the unfortunate victim initially when Sarah and Abraham didn’t wait for the Lord’s timing. But God took care of Hagar and her son, when she felt that there was no hope for either of them. “And God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water; and she went, and filled the bottle with water, and gave the lad drink.” (Genesis 21v19)

Isaac, the son of promise, is the distant earthly forefather of our Lord Jesus Christ – who, praise God, is the answer to all of mankind’s sin and problems. Society has evolved into something undesirable in His eyes, “just as in the days of Noah…”  Yet, in this the Day of Grace, He still stands with arms outstretched to the “whosever” that “shall call on the name of the Lord” and they “shall be delivered.” (Joel 2v32) He came to set us free from sin, death, hell and the snares of this life. He came that we would have life and have it more abundantly and His will is for us to know and love His Word which teaches us how to live.

In much of society it is now considered offensive to quote God’s Word with regard to the great moral dilemmas of our age but do we choose to be silent about the world’s wrongful philosophies or do we uphold the teachings of God’s Word? Like Moses, today’s people of the Lord are “choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season; Esteeming the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures of Egypt: for he had respect unto the recompence of the reward.” (Hebrews 11v25&26) Like Moses, by faith we must forsake Egypt!

As I read my Bible these days, absorbing how it was from the early days of creation, to Noah and the flood and then on to Abraham and the generations after him, I feel the Lord saying to me continually that “with God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19v26) Faith is the victory that overcomes the world! “For whosoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith.” (1John 5v4)

The faith of a multitude of Old Testament characters is portrayed in Hebrews 11 and it is faith that has made men and women triumph over adversity throughout the ages. Yes, there is no situation too impossible or too complicated for the Lord to deal with and put right. Whatever our background, our inherited problems or the complications of our family history or situation, there is nothing too hard for the Lord, if we but give Him our all and trust Him to save us to the uttermost.

“Is anything too hard for the Lord?” (Genesis 18v14) Praise God, those who put their trust in Him look… “for an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away” (1Peter 1v4) and “for a city which hath foundations, whose builder and maker is God.” (Hebrews 11v10)

 

 

On the Forthcoming Children’s Referendum in Ireland – and Making an Informed Decision

November 7, 2012

I rarely comment on political matters; however the forthcoming referendum is something which I believe could have very deep repercussions for our society as a whole. Most political parties are urging people to vote ‘yes,’ with appeals on hoardings worded in such a way as to touch the heart of any concerned and caring parent…. “Vote yes,” they say, “to protect your children.”

I felt that the information booklet on the Children’s Referendum which was distributed to Irish households did not give individuals the comprehensive information they needed to make an informed choice and so, as an individual who sincerely wanted to do the right thing with my vote, I prayed about it and asked the Lord to show me what to do.

I then discovered that under the new legislation children can be brought out of the country for abortions – even if the child disagrees, while the state can decide to give birth control to children of any age, even if they are below the age of consent.

Children can be taken from their parents and given over for adoption by mere virtue of the fact that they have fallen into poverty and children, far from having ‘rights,’ could, I believe, become pawns in some very sinister decisions about their future, including being forcibly adopted by some highly unsuitable couples.

I am happy to say that all of my children are now in their twenties… but what of their children, if they ever have any? Therefore I cannot be complacent, for what we do as individuals with our votes now, will collectively affect generations to come. I feel that those who claim to know the Lord Jesus Christ as Saviour have a responsibility in these matters to be prayerfully informed – just as they have a responsibility, like the saints of Berea, to search the scriptures daily, to see whether the things they are told are correct. (Acts 17v11)

I find it surprising that many people appear to accept blindly every word that is uttered behind a pulpit, just as individuals accept words projected to them from a political hoarding and vote accordingly.

Thankfully in our society we can still read the Word of God, without fear of reprisal – and yet we may discover that if we quote from God’s Word and stand by it, many will be against us. This reminds me of Daniel who “purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king’s meat, nor with the wine which he drank…” (Daniel 1v8)

Those who claim to own the Lord Jesus Christ as Saviour must ‘purpose’ in their hearts not to defile themselves by going along with popular opinion or the philosophy of the age. Our every word, action and opinion must be prayerfully considered in the light of God’s Word – whether it is simply casting our votes or forming opinions on something as crucial as the future welfare of little children or older children who have fallen into vulnerable circumstances in our society.